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A drunk man who smelled like beer sat down on a subway next to a priest. The man's tie was stained, his face was plastered with red lipstick, and a half-empty bottle of gin was sticking out of his torn coat pocket.

He opened his newspaper and began reading. After a few minutes the man turned to the priest and asked, 

'Say Father, what causes arthritis?'

The priest replies, 'My Son, it’s caused by loose living being with cheap, wicked women, too much alcohol, contempt for your fellow man, sleeping around with prostitutes and lack of a bath.'

The drunk muttered in response,

'Well, I'll be damned, 'Then returned to his paper.

The priest, thinking about what he had said, nudged the man and apologized. 'I'm very sorry. I didn't mean to come on so strong.

How long have you had arthritis?' The drunk answered, 'I don't have it, Father. I was just reading here that the Pope does.'

MORAL: Make sure you understand the question before offering the answer.

Silence is golden

A guy joins a monastery and takes a vow of silence: he's allowed to say two words every seven years. After the first seven years, the elders bring him in and ask for his two words. "Cold floors," he says. They nod and send him away. Seven more years pass. They bring him back in and ask for his two words. He clears his throats and says, "Bad food." They nod and send him away. Seven more years pass. They bring him in for his two words. "I quit," he says. "That's not surprising," the elders say. "You've done nothing but complain since you got here."











Probus Club Five Dock

                                                   No 230 

                                       Monday December 4th, 2017

     Meetings held at 10am every 1st Monday of the month at

                Tigers Five Dock Barnstaple Road Five Dock


    There are no strangers here only friends you have not yet met





President                    Wayne Bredin                          9713-2993

           Vice President             Claude Bennie                         9713-8238

           Secretary                    Bill Dawson                              9713-6565

                Minute Secretary        Claude Bennie                         9713-8238

                Treasurer                    Warwick Easton                      9799-2744

            Club Outings               Bill Steele                                9713-3027

            Welfare                       Claude Bennie                        9713-8238

Speakers                     Bill Steele                                9713 8305

Claude Bennie                        9713 5727

            Membership                Bob Burns                               9712-1062

            Public Officer             Warwick Easton                      9799-2744

             Bulletin                        Bill Dawson                             9713-6565



Date of next meeting January 8th, 2018





The December meeting was attended by 19 members, with 3 apologies.


Welcome, President Wayne welcomed everyone.




Probus South Pacific, Active retirees


Treasurer’s Report

Bank Balance at 30th September $761.96


Welfare Report.

Geoff Hanley still not mobile, now .in the hands of a neuro surgeon.


Five minute speaker.

Bruce read a poem named ‘Is this the bush”.?

Claude told a few jokes


General Business

Clarrie Gluskie reported on the dinner meeting with Rodd Point ladies. He was very enthusiastic about the meeting and lunch,

Bill Dawson commented that he was told by one member that he shouldn’t be there as it was a ladies Club

5 members failed to attend the lunch, Claude paid for the meal and was reimbursed by those who missed the dinner.


The Garden Island tour will be attended by 5 members. Meet at Abbotsford Ferry wharf at 8.58 to catch the ferry to Circular Quay.


The Christmas lunch will follow the December Meeting. Partners and guests are welcome. The meal cost is the responsibility of the member. Some wine and beer will be provided on the tables.

Names are required, so, the caterer will know the number of meals to provide

Probus Web Site.

The secretary was asked to contact Probus, for advice on how to set up a web page. This was done and we now have a web page for public viewing. This site must be manually updated. The following link will take you to where changes can be made to your web page


To access this web site Type into a browser.

A dialogue box will appear asking you to sign in.

In the Login space type in [email protected]

The password is 72TtdQby.

Go to the Five Dock web page where changes can be made to the website.


To view the Five Dock Web page do the following.

Type Probus South Pacific into your browser.

Click on Find a Club

A page will open with a dialogue box will open, type in your postcode, then click on NSW.


The clubs in your vicinity will be shown on the left, click on Five Dock, then click on show details, click on view site.

The web page will open, some pages have information in them.

The welcome site shows the Clubs details. click on the bulletin and the last newsletter is viewable.


Guest Speaker

Octobers Speaker was Les Miller, who spoke about spending 15 months on Ice, frozen not chemical.

In 1964 Les applied for a position of wireless operator in an Australian National Antarctic Research Expedition to Antarctica. He was among 50 applicants for this position. Along with 3 others he obtained the position of Wireless Operator.

He showed many slides of the activities undertaken, dog sled team training, Aurora Borealis, Mid-winter Lunch. Emperor penguins, they are very inquisitive and not frightened by humans.

He was supposed to only be there for 12 months but circumstances dictated otherwise and he ended up being away foe 15 months.

His talk created many questions by members, Les answered

Clarrie Gluskie thanked Les and  presented him with the usual gift.


Future guest speakers.

Today.. Ashley Quinn History of Breakfast Point.

December Beryl Favaloro, Dietician at RPA