Students in an advanced Biology class were taking their mid-term exam.  The last question was, 'Name seven advantages of Mother's Milk.'  The question was worth 70 points or none at all.  One student was hard put to think of seven advantages.  He wrote:

                  1) It is the perfect formula for the child.

                  2) It provides immunity against several diseases.

                  3) It is always the right temperature.

                  4) It is inexpensive.

                  5) It bonds the child to the mother and vice versa.

                  6) It is always available as needed

And then the student was stuck.  Finally, in desperation, just before the bell rang indicating the end of the test he wrote:

                 7) It comes in two attractive containers and it's high enough off

                           the ground where the cat can't get it.

                                         He got an A+.

An elderly, but hardy cattleman from Queensland once told a young female neighbour that if she wanted to live a long life, the secret was to sprinkle a pinch of gunpowder on her oatmeal each morning.  She did this religiously and lived to the ripe old age of 103.  She left behind 14 children, 30 grandchildren, 21 great-grandchildren, five great-great-grandchildren and a 40-foot HOLE where the crematorium used to be.